Our First Assignment

So we were in!  I can't begin to describe how hopeful we were to be in this program!  I really didn't even know how valuable this program was going to be back then, but we were IN!  And at the time, that is all that really mattered.

It must seem like we are desperate people, or rather I am.  Well, I was!  Imagine - and I know some of you may be currently feeling like I was, or may have felt like I did - finding out that your child or husband, parent or loved one, had a serious condition where there was no known cure.  A condition where they could potentially not be able to complete school, live on their own, marry, have children, a career of their own?  Yep, this is where I had headed.  And, to be honest, where Josh had headed too.  We had basically accepted that Patrick would be with us forever, we would never be empty nesters, never be able to travel the world, and do things retired people do together.  I am sure this sounds fairly selfish, but we had never planned for our lives to be like this.  And I promise you, as I sit here writing this, I have tears streaming down my face.  Not that we are not thrilled with where we are, and would never, and I do mean NEVER, change a single thing in our lives, but occasionally we do wish and wonder if.  We have never lost our hope that things may eventually turn out the way you hope it will.

Do you remember all of the hopes, and dreams you had for your child/children, when you were expecting them?  How many future Doctor, Lawyer, baseball player, fireman, nurse, teacher, president bibs, onesies have been purchased over the years that expressed just that, your desires for your child to be all that he/she can be, or even more truthful, that you want them to be.

Well, it is hard, when reality smacks you right in the face, and you realize that this may not be the case with your child.  And, there would be a possibility that our youngest Peter - newly arrived on the scene could also have Autism (he doesn't by the way, he comes by his silly, wonderfullness all on his own with nothing to blame:-) ).  So a few boo hoos are warranted.  The hardest thing for us was we only had each other to talk about things to.  I know family, you will say you were there, and you were, we know, we would not have been able to do it without you!  But sometimes you need someone who truly understands where you are, what you are feeling, and where you hope to go.  Someone who just listens, and doesn't try to find a solution for you.

All during these first several months, (heck we are still doing this) of our diagnosis, we were gathering and processing information, working our jobs, caring for our four children, trying to maintain our marriage and friendships, let alone hobbies, interests, house work, laundry, day to day stuff, and we were just about to pile on a whole lot more with the +EIBI program.  I literally had NO IDEA what we were getting into.

I also want to make it VERY CLEAR, the EIBI program was the best thing that ever happened to our family and especially to Patrick.  We are eternally grateful to Dr. Kim and the long list of Tudors who worked with Patrick, and us every day straight for six years.

Well we went to our first meeting with Dr. Kim.  And there were three other families there with us.  This was the first time we actually met other families of children on the spectrum.  It was amazing!  It was so interesting to hear about their challenges, and a relief at the same time to know it could be worse than it was for us...

Dr. Kim began to explain what the EIBI program was all about.  It was essentially behavior modification, with STRICTLY POSITIVE Reinforcement.  We were going to help shape Patrick's behavior into a ore typical behavior through small rewards when he does something correct.  Can you say Pavlov's Dogs?  I laugh now, but it began sort of like that.  We were going to teach Patrick a conditional response for doing something he should have learned.  Eventually it would be a series of tasks, but for starter we would be helping him understand features, functions and classes (color, animal, reptile; room, kitchen, cook and eat in it).

Basically we learned in this first class that Patrick had skipped over the cognitive phase of his development.   Translation, what most of us learned through observation and association, he couldn't learn.  For example, he didn't know what a cabinet was.  One day he looked at me and said " goahgagob," or something roughly like that, while pointing at the cabinet.  I said, "yes, that is a cabinet."  Where most of us learned while observing the conversation of the people in our house and when they would say it's in the cabinet and we watched the other person go to the cabinet, we knew what it was.  Patrick did not have this ability.  He was not able to process just verbal instructions.  (hence the +Velcro and pictures).

SUNSHINE SOLUTIONS RESOURCE CORNER:
+Google images is a great place to start for your picture schedules of objects and activities.  Just google what you are looking for, click on the images tab and go to town.  I actually purchased a laminating machine to help make these things more durable.  I will try harder to work more of these kinds of ideas into my posts.  Also, go online and look for a resource for +Velcro (hoops and loops) dots.  These are so much easier to work with.  I purchased bulk rolls of both and am still using them today.  For conversations or daily activities, you can use a paint stick (FREE!).  I also covered the front of a 3" binder with Velcro stripes.  There I could lay out  Patrick's entire morning or afternoon schedule so he had it at a glance.  These activities (games, blocks, etc) are also very valuable to use when they learn to read.  More on this to come!  I promise!

Our first assignment at the end of this class, (I have left a ton out due to the proprietary  nature of the program, but look it up! or send me an email and I will forward to you the contact information of the program.)  was to go home and create a vision, mission and goals for Patrick's EIBI program.  Why you ask?  Well, we were encouraged to treat this program like a home business (and it really was, with employees, benefits and the whole nine yards!).

NOOOO  Problem!  I did this kind of thing for a living.  I created brands, set up companies and their outward face to the world.  I could definitely do this!  For the first time in months, I was in my comfort zone.  Here is what I came up with:

VISION:
To help Patrick achieve and maintain a main-stream/"normal" status.

MISSION:
To guide Patrick's development through application of the EIBI training to where his PDDNOS diagnosis had little to no effect on his daily life.

GOALS:

1.  To ensure all tutor sand parents are consistently adhering to +TKOC EIBI's programming.
2. Communicate & Apply teachings to all members of Patrick's multi-disciplinary team.
3. Provide a structured, patient and loving environment - a place where Patrick wants to be.
4. Achieve 40 hours of tutoring 52 weeks of the year.
1. NO EXCUSES!  Patrick will only get out of this what we put into this.  Remember, this is our opportunity to help him achieve the vision!  

(see, I told you I was in mission mode!)  I promise, this is exactly as it appears in his Business Binder!  I  just pulled out his master program binder, and this is the first page in the book. I'll try to add some photos of Patrick at the time we began this program.  He had such a sweet face, and looks like a baby!

Well, our first assignment was done.  I felt like it was the start to a great business plan.  I can't wait to tell you what happened next!  Join me on my next mission.  Lets meet at the corner of Hope and Love!